When we look up the definition of etiquette in the dictionary it is defined as a ‘conventional code of conduct’. Usually refers to societal expectations of how we conduct ourselves in social situations. However, we feel that it is just as important to apply a certain code of etiquette to ourselves.
Fitting at a time when we’re all more stressed, overworked and under more pressure, we present 6 rules for a little common courtesy for ourselves:
Most important etiquette rule: Be kind, always
Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and told yourself you’re disgusted by what is looking back? It may start off as ‘I don’t like how my hair looks’ but you’ll quickly become focused on other areas and talk in more general, derogatory terms like, ‘this dress makes me look fat’, ‘I’m just so ugly’. It’s quite a downward spiral.
These negative thoughts and feelings often escalate when we’re stressed, frustrated and tired. We often blame ourselves for everything and when catch ourselves in the mirror we quite literarily tell ourselves off.
Override this negative cycle by looking out for the good in you. Complement yourself on the features you do like, the good work you do, the good friend you are. Eventually, those negative niggles will abate. Giving you more confidence in yourself.
What if you said to a stranger everything you said to yourself?
Warning: It’s a bit of a tear-jerker!
Etiquette rule number two: Allow yourself some time, just for you
It’s important that you indulge in things you enjoy doing and giving yourself some ‘free time’ for something just for you.
Whether it’s planning in a monthly massage, giving yourself a little pamper each day, reading a book, getting outside in your lunch break and getting a little fresh air. Always be sure to plan in some time just for you.
You’ll feel better for it overall and you’re more likely to be more productive and calmer for it.
Etiquette rule number 3: Do not give more of yourself than you can
You’re giving away a little piece of yourself constantly; to your boss for work, your children, elderly relatives, friends and family. But it’s important that you say no from time to time so that A. it’s not expected of you every time and B. because sometimes, what you plan for yourself, is more important than what is being asked of you.
It’s time to start drawing a line in the sand and not compromising on what is important and brings value to you, and what isn’t or doesn’t.
Take back control of choice.
Etiquette rule number four: Your health comes first
‘You need to take care of yourself first. If you don’t care for yourself, you can’t take care of someone else’. Kathleen O’Brien.
It can be all too easy to skip a meal, reach for processed foods instead of prepping a healthy meal, grabbing a chocolate bar or coffee on the go when you’re in need of a burst of energy, compromising on a couple of hours sleep so you can catch up on work or spending time with friends. But it all catches up.
If you don’t ensure you have a balanced diet, get regular exercise, some fresh air and sunlight and giving yourself some adequate time to take a rest, you’re going to be more prone to illness and lethargy. You’re leaving yourself on the brink of burnout.
Give yourself a good foundation to ensure that you can still be the best employee, friend, mother and daughter. Your health must always come first so you can still do all the things that are important to you.
Etiquette rule number five: Take your own advice
You’re smart and experienced so when faced with a dilemma, consider it objectively.
No one likes to get advice, though we’re all very quick to give it out. Yet, we’re unlikely to listen to our own advice, despite it being quite sound indeed. You have the ability and resources to help you resolve any issue. Just consider if a friend of family member were in that situation, what would you tell them? Instead of discarding that thought process, determine how you can and should use it.
Etiquette rule number six: Give a gift to yourself
Rewarding yourself for a job well-done is just as important as the perceived gratification you’ll get from whomever set the challenge. Which let’s be honest, you may not get any reward or recognition from them at all.
Giving yourself a little treat each time you achieve a goal or objective will help you to be motivated, feel more confident and appreciated.
“You are responsible for your own happiness. If you expect others to make you happy, you will always be disappointed.”
We hope you found our etiquette guide for you helpful. It really is important to give yourself as much love and care as you do to others. If you’re looking for ways to boost your confidence, we hope our further reading below will be helpful.