If you struggle to orgasm, you may be suffering from a condition called anorgasmia. We welcome back Lizzie Smith, Hypnotherapist, to discuss this common form of sexual dysfunction and how hypnotherapy can play a role in helping you to overcome the mental barrier that commonly affects this condition.  

As a clinical hypnotherapist, I have, over the years, worked with many female clients to help them overcome various women’s health-related issues; from improving fertility to transitioning through menopause and a wide range of more specific so-called gynaecological conditions, such as vaginismus, low libido and anorgasmia. I say ‘so-called’ because I do not see nor treat these issues as gynaecological conditions; instead, more often than not, they are psychological problems linked to the way the patient thinks rather than a physical illness.

Hypnotherapy uses hypnosis – a safe and relaxing technique using positive suggestion – to change the way we think. More specifically, it works with the subconscious part of the mind to clear away any unhelpful thoughts or memories that might affect how we react and behave in our everyday lives. When we achieve a relaxed trance-like state within hypnosis, it becomes possible to facilitate positive change in our subconscious thinking. Whatever we want to achieve is possible here, so it is a potent and life-changing form of therapy.

What is anorgasmia?

Anorgasmia, when you cannot orgasm, is a debilitating condition that affects many women, but sadly, it is not something that is easily talked about and can cause feelings of embarrassment and frustration and manifest distressing emotions of missing out and abnormality.

I have been successfully treating women with this condition for years now, and the results have been having such a positive effect on their lives and sexual well-being that I decided to spread the word and published a blog about it on my website to discuss how hypnotherapy can help. In response, I am now seeing more women than ever with this condition, and the results speak for themselves. Hypnotherapy has made a profound difference in their relationships and how they feel about themselves: happier and more fulfilled.

When we experience orgasm, our brains light up with activity, releasing a range of hormones and neurochemicals. Chief among these is dopamine, a hormone that is responsible for feelings of pleasure, desire and motivation. Then there’s oxytocin, which makes us feel close to others and promotes affection; and prolactin, which is responsible for that feeling of satisfaction that accompanies orgasm. So, orgasms relieve stress and tension and create feelings of pleasure and connection with a partner. Basically, they are good for us, so if you cannot have them, please carry on reading…

How can hypnotherapy help overcome anorgasmia?

As I mentioned earlier, the powerful thing about hypnosis is that it accesses the subconscious part of the mind to remove any unhelpful thoughts, memories, or beliefs to facilitate the change you are looking for. So, if you consciously want to be able to relax and enjoy sex, then it will happen!

Anorgasmia is a condition that women can have for their entire adult life, or it can just happen out of the blue. It can occur after events like taking certain types of medication, childbirth, menopause, hormonal changes, tiredness, and work stress, which can all affect how one feels during sex. If there is a history of trauma or abuse, this can be a factor, but often, there is nothing that a woman may be consciously aware of that has led to a feeling of ‘being let down’ by her own body.

There may be many underlying issues affecting a woman’s enjoyment of sex: relationship problems, low self-esteem, an inability to relax, and a fear of loss of control, or pain. Whatever the original cause, anorgasmia is most likely due to psychological factors, and the good news is that it is treatable with hypnotherapy because hypnotherapy reframes the way we think about and how our body responds.

Our fears live in the subconscious part of our mind and are our most primitive form of protection – the ‘fight or flight’ response. However, fears are not subtle in their approach to a problem, and they can freeze or block our emotional connection so that we disengage from what is happening to us. For anorgasmia sufferers, as their emotional responses heighten during sexual activity, their subconscious fears can link this to a feeling of loss of control and shut down the production of feel-good chemicals such as dopamine. The path to orgasm is stalled, but the fear of loss of control dissipates, and the subconscious learns to respond similarly if triggered in the future. Over the years, this learned response is repeated over and over and becomes a disappointing reality for many women and their partners. With hypnosis, we release that fear and create a preferable mindscape so the client can relax and focus on the pleasure experience rather than a feeling of impending failure.

In hypnotherapy, we link the mind and body, and that powerful connection is critical in overcoming psychosexual issues such as anorgasmia. We help the sufferer to release the fear and stop overthinking so that they learn once again to relax and achieve their goal of orgasm because their body does know what to do.

We work to remove the negative associations you may have had around sex and help you take back control so that you feel comfortable and empowered. You will also find that you understand yourself on a deeper level. This will then enable you to get your sex life back on track by changing the way you think so that you will be more fulfilled, healthier and happier.

Think Better. Feel Better. Live Better.

Lizzie Smith Hypnotherapy

Lizzie is a clinical hypnotherapist with a successful practice built on reputation, recommendation and referral.  She uses Hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) and Brain Working Recursive Therapy® (BWRT®) to treat her clients. Lizzie is an accredited member of the APHP, a Hypnotherapy Supervisor and a Bereavement Counsellor with a particular interest in the area of women’s health. She provides a service to clients of all gender in the UK and internationally. All her sessions are online.

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